Viruses, more ER visits, and the MTHFR test

I’ve wanted to make some posts, but a few things have set me back. The holidays, unexpected family visitations, and a virus.

Usually I’d go into extensive detail of dates and symptom progression, because the nature of my “viral” infections are questionable as to whether it was an acquired seasonal bug, or a flare-up of something I already have. This was definitely something I caught.

It started with a “feels like I’ve swallowed glass” sore throat and proceeded to cause symptoms of every seasonal fluke known to man…except a cough, THANK GOD! The whole ordeal lasted nine days, if I remember correctly. The first four, my body was trying to figure out what was happening. Aside from feeling especially like hell with glass-throat, I couldn’t tell anything apart from my regular symptoms. And then it abruptly realized I had a bug and went into “attack it!” mode, which sent me to the ER the first time, with rapid-onset fever and of course, dehydration.

The second ER visit was due to intractable head pain. Let’s put it this way: I usually take my pain meds twice a day? I was taking them every four hours, they were only barely working, and I had to set an alarm to wake me up while sleeping to take them or I’d wake up sobbing. It turned out that all the.. I’ll say trauma, of the added stress triggered my occipital neuralgia. Once I figured that out, I was able to treat it, which is to say, use the combination of meds and heat I know to be effective in calming the storm until it passed.

I always say I’d rather have a full-blown migraine for a week than an attack of occipital neuralgia for even one day. They gave me hydromorphone. Twice. (I’ve said to “normals” that they gave me morphine, because everyone know what that is, but they actually gave me Dilaudid, which is about three times stronger than morphine.)

A funny thing happened as I recovered from this. My immune system apparently got distracted from attacking me, and I had much-reduced pain and no vasculitis for about a week. Then it remembered who I was again, but I enjoyed those “days off” from everything!

I haven’t been on ANY of my vitamins or supplements since it started, but another funny thing: I can’t tell any difference. This is a complete 180 from when I was in treatment and I could tell which supplement I forgot by which symptom popped up within the next two days–arrhythmia if I’d forgotten my calcium, a migraine if it was my magnesium, chest pain if Co Q-10. Randomly, but perhaps importantly, I’m REALLY REALLY glad I was taking high-dose Vitamin C in the month prior to that virus finding me! That might be why it took four days to really settle in. (Vitamin C doesn’t help much if you’re healthy, but if you’re immunocompromised it can make a big difference.)

My best guess is that, my body doesn’t need as much help since I am not in treatment? I’d like to think it’s a good thing that I can now survive without supplementation, and I’m not planning on going back on everything unless necessary. I know I need magnesium to preserve my nerve function. And the Co Q-10 for the M.E.; I’ve been having chest pains galore from all the activity sans supplementation to help my muscles recover. And possibly my B-complex, also for nerves, but I’m going to hold off on that until I get the results of this new test I’m having to see if I have the MTHFR gene mutation. (Yes I am aware of what that looks like an abbreviation for, and yes, I laughed.) It can prevent the body from detoxing properly and also cause hyperhomocysteinemia (can we just call that hyperhomo? that’s funny, too) which can result in vascular problems and strange reactions to B vitamins… I have all of that! But of course I have symptoms of everything, so I can’t get TOO excited. It’s a gene mutation so it can’t be cured, but it can be managed if we know I have it.

Since I don’t know the rate at which I’ll be posting, I’ll just give you a preview. I’m going to talk about my New Year’s resolutions, how taking a one-month break from Twitter affected me, and how Christianity never helped me deal with the reality of chronic illness. Eventually I will also describe what my pain is actually like, because chronic pain means different things to different people, and I’d like to talk about my version.

See you soon!

a rainbow at night

Well THIS wasn’t supposed to happen so soon.

Being off my olive leaf extract has meant my brain is back to a constant fog. It’s funny, I’ve taken it so long that I really only notice how much it helps whenever I have to take a break for whatever reason. (With most herbs you’re supposed to take a 2-week break about every 4 months, so your body doesn’t become dependent on its effects and forget how to function without it.) Right now I’m breaking because I’m unsure of what effect it has on my liver (being such a powerful antioxidant, it should actually help, but I don’t know for sure), and I don’t want it to mess up my test results when I get my enzymes rechecked next week.

And being off any antibiotic whatsoever apparently equates to the Lyme disease moving to attack my arms. These illnesses have already done damage to my brain, cranial nerves, autonomic nervous system, legs, and now it looks like they’re moving somewhere new. As a friend pointed out, it seems logical that the bugs would try to get my arms, since they’re already weakened from the ME.

That week I was off everything, between finishing bartonella treatment and starting the Lyme treatment, the neuropathy spread to my arms. When I got on Flagyl, as I think I mentioned last post, everything stopped progressing, and I was fine. Now that I’ve been off everything again for a week, it’s going back to my arms… This is almost as disturbing as when the M.E. went to my legs–in other words, it normally doesn’t do that, and for it to be going there means a bad sign. (No dramatizing, just real facts.) I’m silently hoping it won’t do any damage before I get back on treatment. I didn’t think it’d have time to do anything, but with it acting like this…!

In the mean time, I have my B complex, and magnesium to help protect my nerves as much as I can… I stopped my Vitamin C because it can impact total biliburin count and mine is the very lowest at 0.3 mg/dL, so I can’t have that messing up my test results, either.

I know I have very little control over what happens, but the last thing I need is nerve damage to my arms, which already suffer so many restrictions.

Ah, and the point of mentioning the state of my brain, was, I’m still working on those posts I promised, but not much can be done with so much brain fog!

a rainbow at night

Letting go of society’s expectations, symptom recaps, and improvement with bartonella.

Despite the fact that my brain has been functioning a lot better recently, I haven’t much felt like updating. Completely the opposite of several weeks back, when I couldn’t think to save my soul but desperately had things to say! I’m learning a new language, so most of my spare brain energy has been going into that. It will also help me decide if I may be able to attempt finishing my degree come next August. If I cannot, however, I think I’d be okay with just letting it go. Afterall, I do have at least one degree–even if it’s not what I set out for–and my health is too precious to waste on going to university to finish a degree I may never be able to use, and which may worsen me trying to complete.
I have fought too hard to get to this point, and I don’t want what society says I should be doing to dictate what would actually be best for me. If I do reach the point where I am finally stable, then I would love to try and finish and become a researcher, or at the very least, a counselor. But that would take a lot of trust in the fact that I’d still be stable and healthy enough to actually do those things after my degree was finished. If I never again become that well, wouldn’t it be better to attempt some type of small job with the degree I already have, than use up everything I’ve gained in pursuit of something that won’t do me any good? But even that would require more health than making sure I don’t starve on my own. If I only improve enough to take care of my basic needs, I will be thankful.

Illness has taught me my worth is not defined by how much money I make, or what level of degree I have, or what job I have (if any, if ever). I am worthy because I am here, because I exist.

Randomly: I’ve gotten several followers the past few weeks from all over the world–oh, the power of the internet is amazing!

Okay, let’s see. From the 16th-23rd I was having a typical Lyme flare… How is it possible that this pattern hasn’t changed, practically since the time I got it? Is it really THAT predictable? But yes, severe headache and neuropathy issues, and I also recall being more cognitively impaired during then, as well as thirsty–again, all typical. What’s not-so-typical is that I’ve had nasal allergies the past week. I can’t tell if it’s eosinophilia related (hopefully not) or something I’m exposed to in my environment. It’s not like I go outside or even open the windows lately, with it being so cold, but either way, since I’m not allergic to anything except chamomile, this is puzzling! I’m definitely reacting to something–I just don’t know if it’s internal or external. I have Astelin, until I figure out what’s going on.

I felt it’d be okay to restart my stretching routine a couple weeks ago, so every other day I get some exercise! No relapse, yet. I’ve been able to cook a lot lately, also, which is encouraging. It’s still difficult and frustrating because of my muscles and their tendency to fail the day after using them, but hopefully that will improve more soon. If it got worse when I got these infections, surely it will improve as I continue to treat them.

Dare I say that the bartonella eradication is going as planned? The Bactrim is amazing, and I think the bart is.. well, it might be gone, or at least, finally beat into submission?! The protocol is to continue treatment two months past the cessation of symptoms, and I talk to my Lyme specialist next month, so we’ll see what he says. Then I can start Tindamax to finally treat the Lyme! The antibiotics I’m on now treat it, but only very minorly–just enough to keep it from taking over. I’ll be stopping the Rifampin since I can’t take it with Tindamax, but I may stay on a maintanence dose of the Bactrim, since bartonella has a crazy-high rate of relapse, and I do not want to go through this again. I feel I’m probably being unrealistic that I should never face it again, with the way my immune system is, but… For now I’d really like to enjoy my improvement.

Three days ago I started my Zoloft to ward off PMDD and control any outstanding OCD symptoms. I don’t think I was having PMDD yet, but since I was supposed to have taken it again in September, it’s bound to show up soon. My OCD has been flaring and I’ve been hungry all the time, so I know some brain chemicals were out of alignment. I last took it in June, I think, and it was by far too late then!

The past three weeks I’ve had this odd collection of symptoms that fit the description of pelvic floor dysfunction–not saying I have that, but symptom wise, that’s what’s going on. All of my muscles there would randomly tense and were very uncoordinated, no doubt the result of nervous system disruption. :\ I have gotten this on and off over the years, for a day or two at a time, but never three weeks. It’s mostly gone away now. My menses started two days ago so they’re somewhat on schedule again, with every 45 days being my usual. However, if things continue to be.. bizarre, I may see myself going to yet another doctor, so it’s worth keeping track of, yes? I’ve been slightly anemic even before this, and yesterday I had the most random craving for crushed ice (a further sign), so it’s probably no wonder I have been beyond exhausted and out of breath with every move I make. (Anyone else start singing The Police just then? No? Okay.)

A recent study found a correlation between high doses of Vitamin C and a reduction in the rate/increase of heart failure symptoms. Granted it’s just a correlation, but now I feel even greater about taking two tablets per day since last year!

Til next time

a rainbow at night